as i browse through my friends' sites, i find that most are thanking their closest friends for their sincerity and friendship, for their time well spent. i have yet to be able to do that in a single post.
to me, everyone who has impacted my life in someway cannot be expressed by words of gratitude. i once posted a long entry about felsh (heehee), but that was it. if i were to thank someone, it'd take me so long, and i'd fail. (just read my poetry site.) so if i try and i don't do you justice (yes, you), please forgive me. i am trying my best.
this post is not actually a thank you card, i just wanted to express that thought.
something to ponder: "a vision without action is a daydream. any action without vision is a nightmare." -japanese proverb
this post's topic is actually about appearance. it's amazing what first impressions give a person. either curiosity or comformity, if you know what i mean.
i was watching this thing on tv (japanese tv is great), and i came across "pablum hour" (a term i created when nothing on tv is worth watching). i was flipping channels and found to my disbelief, "beauty judge", or the show is so called. i became intrigued the moment i saw the people who were there (excuse my frank language): fat, non-athletic, unkempt, flat out "ugly" people, begging to be changed by these beauty experts on the show. don't get me wrong: i was not attracted to the fact that the judges were making fun of these people. that is definitely not what intrigues me enough to watch the show. in fact, it was the complete opposite. it was the side of me that wanted to punch these shallow-minded people that kept me watching.
the first person was rather large (for an asian), both in height and in width. she worked 10 hours a day, standing, with her feet together and greeting people as they came into the clothing store. to effectively show-off her clothing line, she wore her own items, which were fit for someone half as large. basically, from what the tv captured, she was showing off parts of her body she shouldn't, especially if she wanted er clothes to sell. so she came on the show. she was very charismatic, and she took each blow from the judges with a laugh. but i didn't understand. no matter how much she laughs, i'm sure dealing with it everyday must be something very difficult. i'm was sure her heart was crying. and then one of the judges put her on an expensive diet, complete with salon visits (all free of charge for her, of course. the show pays all.). two months later, she came back on the show and the glow of her smile had completely changed.
for one, she had lost about 25 pounds and was looking slim. she fit nicely in the clothes she sells, and her face. i think i saw the ost drastic change in her facial expressions. though before the transformation, she smiled and laughed just as much, her face glowed with confidence. yes-- confidence is a powerful thing. she then thanked the people on the show who had helped her, and left.
one of the other victims that really caught my eye was this 24-year old lady. she looked far too old to be twenty-four. her hair was messy and her cheeks had sunken in. it was as if there was no life in her. it turns out that she had grown up never having friends. people would stereotype her because of her eyes. they were as big as slits, and were placed very far apart from each other. her nose had slid down her face and she never smiled.
she came on she show to ask if there was anything they could do to fix this "deformity" of her face. and i put "deformity" in quotations because i dont consider it one. why must anyone be generalized by their appearance? her work partners called her a "fish" because her eyes were so far apart, and commented to the reporter that she looked pissed all the time and when she tris to converse with them, it made them feel uneasy and want to throw up. and these are grown adults, ladies and gentlemen. can you imagine, a group of 24-year old women gossiping about how ugly someone is? pathetic.
the judge had told her that her eyes were not actually placed far apart. rather, her nose was so flat that it made no impression of a nose at all. he also said that "by lifting the flattened zone between the eyes by raising the nose, the distance between the two eyes would 'seem' to shorten. basically, an optical illusion. she went through various plastic surgeries on her face. one on her nose (as mentioned above) and one on each eye (lifting her upper lid for fullness). when she had returned a month later on the show, the confidence level had skyrocketed: she was smiling.
and to think, that something so simple, like appearance, had something to do with their inner contentment. i mean, i understand. looking good is something everyone dreams about, and trying to flaunt what you got is by all means wonderful. if however, for any reason, you are submissive to the criticism, like there is nowhere else to go except down with them... then the problem is born. there is NO reason anyone should change their appearance for anyone. if you want to put silicone in your breasts, fine. if you have the need to have higher cheekbones, please go right ahead. but you know what? changing yourself for someone else to accept you? now that's insecurity right there. you don't even have the confidence to be yourself? god damn, who are you going to be then?!
in the end, i became infuriated with the people bringing them down and the people who followed their lead. i changed the channel right then and there. i then realized that i'm so glad to be me, to be what no one else can be.
be more confident in yourself. i can see it in you. people can see it from miles away. and it's beautiful. so show it.
+++++